Wednesday, January 29, 2014

I Encounter Furries: The Adspace on My Computer is Forever Changed

Furry: adjective, Covered with fur.

Furry Fandom: A subculture interested in fictional anthropomorphic animal characters with human personalities and characteristics. -Taken from Wikipedia

And here is a link to a lengthy definition/what I can only assume is a defense of furries from Urban Dictionary: Furries

And finally, here is a picture of some Furries, just in case you don't fully understand. 

This is a very tame picture of furries. Trust me.

I need to back up a little bit. Last week I was working on pub quiz and was attempting to come up with a non-traditional Sports & Leisure category. The week before was a new category I called "Sports Maths!" and it turned out to be quite a bit of fun so I wanted to do something just as fun, if not better. Here are a couple of examples:

An easy example question is: What is the number of innings in a regulation baseball game times the combined total of players allowed on a basketball court during gameplay divided by the number of contestants in a singles tennis match?

A hard example question is: What is the number of Big Four sports teams (NFL, NHL, MLB, NBA) in Ohio times the number of Big Four sports teams in Florida minus the number of Big Four sports teams in Pennsylvania?

While I may not have decided on a better category it was still found a fun one: NFL mascots. The beginning of my research was rather casual...what is the name of the Baltimore Raven mascot named for a famous Baltimorean? What is the state animal of Tennessee that the Titans use as their mascot? What I ended up getting was a lot more. 

As any common user of Internet can attest, it is easy to fall down a rabbit hole. One page search becomes three tabs. Three tabs quickly becomes eight and all of a sudden you're so far from your original search you have a hard time remembering what you were trying to find in the first place. As someone who utilizes Internet as a research tool, these rabbit holes (spider-webs, worm-holes, someday I will come up with a more suitable name for this) can become much deeper and wider and harder to navigate. Thanks to ad-ware and cookies and other internet thingies that track your on-line activity, you will soon be made privy to products you didn't know you needed and games you never knew you wanted to play.

I often include images with the questions to help jog peoples brains and was digging around for mascots being mascots, that is to say, mascots being jerks to little kids or just being jerks. Like this bear cheetah thing in the shades drop-kicking Miles, the Denver Bronco humanoid horse mascot, to the ground.


As I searched for pictures to get a better idea as to what some of these mascots looked like I came across, rather abruptly, some very interesting images of wolf-men getting it on with big boobed cat-ladies. None of which were hipster chicks in stocking caps and oversized sweaters. The cat-ladies were literally cat-LADIES with lady parts, tails, impossibly large boobs, and fur. Like this...
Meow?


I need to clarify that I have nothing against anyone who wishes to express themselves in what some may call an unusual way. Go ahead and do what you want to do. "Oh? You like to look at cat-ladies with big boobs getting railed by wolf-men?" Go for it. By no means are furries the strangest thing I've ever encountered. But they are strange. And I will be the first to admit that I didn't really learn much about them. It is just now, I'm getting a lot of ads on my computer with bouncy kitty boobs playing volleyball and I shit you not, fabric stores. Maybe I'll get into some DIY furry outfit making and see what happens in the bedroom. Probably won't.

I realize that I am making this a sexual thing and I realize that that is not fair. I'm sure there are furry fanatics who don't get turned on by seeing anthropomorphic cat/fox ladies or horse/dog guys, depending on sexual preference, getting it on. I'm sure some people just see it as fun dress-up time. That is great. But since I am not, nor have I ever been a furry, (or turned on by this) I can't help but think that human in animal suit banging is the only thing that happens at a Furry-Con. To quote Seinfeld, "Not that there's anything wrong with that."

I do find the whole thing rather interesting. In fact, it makes me happy to know that there are people out there who aren't afraid to dress up like animals and bandy about with other people who are dressed up like animals. They have a sense of community that may be rooted in something that I don't quite get, but they have a community. They have a place they can go where they belong and fit in. While it may be mostly online in games like FurryMUCK and Furcadia, it still exists. In these places they can escape from what can be a rather harsh reality for someone who is labeled as "different."

I feel as if I've gotten off track a little bit. But as of right now I'm kind of sick and my brain is all over the place so I'm gonna wrap this up.

Brain Droppings: Albedo Anthropomorphics, created by Steve Gallacci, is credited as getting the whole Furry discussion out in the open and was probably more instrumental in shaping your younger years than you are probably aware (If you were a male growing up in the 90s). Remember Usagi Yojimbo? Best friend of Leonardo of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? You can thank the furry movement for him.

Oh, and I may have stretched the truth a little bit earlier in this post. Cheetara was pretty hot.
Thunder-Thunder-Thundercats!.....Hooooooooo!
Coming up next week: I find out something new about the Beatles while learning about Thomas Pynchon, a little bit about something called the Eternal September, and I figure out what the difference between Album of the Year and Record of the Year is!










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